This is going to be a short one, because quite frankly I’m too drained to write a lot. I just finished reading about a 17-year old Los Angeles kid who was shot two Sundays ago, 100 feet from his front door. For no reason. Football star, good grades, stayed away from gangs, and was being recruited by Stanford. Two bangers rolled up behind him, asked him where he was from, and since he didn’t reply...bang bang. Twice in the head. The following Tuesday, a 6-year old was shot while riding in the back of his family’s car, also in LA. Two days later, a 13-year old was killed while picking lemons off the tree in his front yard.
Coincidence that these are all shooting deaths?
I have heard the argument that "guns don’t kill people, people kill people." And it makes me effing sick. Sure, it might be technically true. But if people didn’t have guns, maybe they wouldn’t kill people with them. Of course there’s always going to be those who get their hands on one. But the number of innocent people killed by legally-acquired guns is astounding, and disgusting. Gun possession should be illegal. Period.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Monday, February 11, 2008
Why Erin is Voting for Obama...
I know everyone hates political talk, but I got this e-mail from my friend Erin from high school, and had to post it somewhere...good writing is good writing and she put too much into it, so I figured if a few more people can see it thanks to me, that's not a bad thing...
(05 Feb 08)
I regret having been as quiet and complacent as I was in 2004, and as clueless in 2000. I have had an internal debate over whether or not to write something political...I know some people will disagree, I know people don't care. I try not to engage in political discussions because of the toxic nature of politics today.
Well, oh well. Here's why I am voting for Barack over Hillary. If you are short on time, scroll down to the prose part.
Specific Policy Positions:
1) Obviously Iraq. He stood up against it during his Senate race.
2) I hope for a single-payer health-care plan, but I think the individual mandate is a stupid idea.
3) I think we should re-think our Cuba policy.
4) I think we should re-think or approach to diplomacy.
5) I think undocumented immigrants should have access to drivers' licenses, and anything else than can help them live and work with dignity and safety here.
6) I think Obama will handle women's issues as well or better than Hillary (in other words, I don't think Hillary will be any better on this simply because she is a woman).
Other practical matters:
1) I think Obama will be far better received abroad, as a multi-cultural symbol, as a symbol of change, as a leader open to diplomacy. As a bonus to his character and demeanor, he has lived and has family abroad.
2) I think he will be better received by Republicans and will work better across the aisle.
3) I think he has a far better chance of beating McCain - because of his consistent position against the war - some Republicans are already crossing over.
4) I think he will be amazing for the Democratic party.
Hillary:
1) I don't think all "35 years" count as experience
2) She has been triangulating for too long
3) I think she would make a far more competent president than Bush, but I think she would sell us out too often.
4) She makes a competent, but not a gifted leader. We need to do better than that.
This brings me to the most important thing. I was 19 years old when Bush was elected. I am now 27. My adult life has been defined by this madness - a long process of disillusionment and growing resentment toward this country, our process, toward America, really, sadly, because this is what I have known. My little brother was 12, he is now 19. He has grown up during a time of war. The under 30-crowd is turning out in record numbers because we don't want this to be our legacy. Our future is uncertain. We are fed up.
I have never in my life experienced the deep sense of utter fatigue that I have felt from Americans this year. It is emotional. It is psychological. We have been told that our votes, our opinions, our constitution don't matter. We have been convinced that lies and fear rule. Many of us strongly consider moving abroad. We pretend we are Canadian when we travel. Our government promotes speculation on our health, our homes, our educations, our retirements. It is not empty rhetoric to say that we are broken as a people. We are deeply tired and deeply sad. We want our dignity back, we want to heal.
That is why this election matters so much. It is not high-flying overly idealistic rhetoric to say that we need to truly re-engage each other, and understand that our government is US. Our democracy, our future depends on it. Barack Obama believes this, and Hillary doesn't come close. Words and ideas DO matter. The ability to move a crowd, the courage to say things that no politicians think can be said - that is not just charisma - that is not just "yeah he does speak well" - that is gifted leadership. That is what we need.
Look at what the rhetoric of fear has done. The power of an idea that becomes an emotion, and then a reality. Why not the rhetoric of hope? of unity? The other side has had control of words and ideas for too long.
It matters that we collectively remember that we are supposed to be, that we HAVE to be looking out for each other, for a social good, because that is where good policy comes from. Inspiration matters and character matters. We need a truly transformative leader and we are fortunate beyond all belief to have one running for president.
That is why I am voting for Barack Obama.
***
You have to see this is you haven't. Michelle Obama's speech at UCLA rally is badass. She is speaking without a script. Here is the best link I could find for it:
http://barackfuture.com/2008/02/04/michelle-obamas-amazing-speech-at-ucla/
the whole event can be found on CSPAN:
rtsp://video.c-span.org/archive/c08/c08_020308_obama.rm?start=0:35:37
Highlights of Michelle's speech if you don't have time to watch it:
1) Barack's state legislature and community organizing experience translate into a clear understanding of how federal policy affects local and state realities. Having worked as an advocate at a local coalition, that is HUGE.
2) Michelle and Barack are only 3 years out of paying off their education debt, and they are only out because of his book sales. No trust funds. No sense of entitlement.
3) If you didn't know, he was first African-American president of the Harvard Law Review. He is utterly capable.
AND if you haven't seen the Yes We Can Video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjXyqcx-mYY
the artist Will.I.am was inspired by the speech, called his friends, made the video 2 days and posted it independently on the internet.
"Nothing can stand in the way of million of voices calling for change."
Vote tomorrow or when it's your turn. If you dig it, get online, get on the phone, SPREAD THE WORD. Put yourself out there, that is what this will take.
"In the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope."
Peace,
Erin
(05 Feb 08)
I regret having been as quiet and complacent as I was in 2004, and as clueless in 2000. I have had an internal debate over whether or not to write something political...I know some people will disagree, I know people don't care. I try not to engage in political discussions because of the toxic nature of politics today.
Well, oh well. Here's why I am voting for Barack over Hillary. If you are short on time, scroll down to the prose part.
Specific Policy Positions:
1) Obviously Iraq. He stood up against it during his Senate race.
2) I hope for a single-payer health-care plan, but I think the individual mandate is a stupid idea.
3) I think we should re-think our Cuba policy.
4) I think we should re-think or approach to diplomacy.
5) I think undocumented immigrants should have access to drivers' licenses, and anything else than can help them live and work with dignity and safety here.
6) I think Obama will handle women's issues as well or better than Hillary (in other words, I don't think Hillary will be any better on this simply because she is a woman).
Other practical matters:
1) I think Obama will be far better received abroad, as a multi-cultural symbol, as a symbol of change, as a leader open to diplomacy. As a bonus to his character and demeanor, he has lived and has family abroad.
2) I think he will be better received by Republicans and will work better across the aisle.
3) I think he has a far better chance of beating McCain - because of his consistent position against the war - some Republicans are already crossing over.
4) I think he will be amazing for the Democratic party.
Hillary:
1) I don't think all "35 years" count as experience
2) She has been triangulating for too long
3) I think she would make a far more competent president than Bush, but I think she would sell us out too often.
4) She makes a competent, but not a gifted leader. We need to do better than that.
This brings me to the most important thing. I was 19 years old when Bush was elected. I am now 27. My adult life has been defined by this madness - a long process of disillusionment and growing resentment toward this country, our process, toward America, really, sadly, because this is what I have known. My little brother was 12, he is now 19. He has grown up during a time of war. The under 30-crowd is turning out in record numbers because we don't want this to be our legacy. Our future is uncertain. We are fed up.
I have never in my life experienced the deep sense of utter fatigue that I have felt from Americans this year. It is emotional. It is psychological. We have been told that our votes, our opinions, our constitution don't matter. We have been convinced that lies and fear rule. Many of us strongly consider moving abroad. We pretend we are Canadian when we travel. Our government promotes speculation on our health, our homes, our educations, our retirements. It is not empty rhetoric to say that we are broken as a people. We are deeply tired and deeply sad. We want our dignity back, we want to heal.
That is why this election matters so much. It is not high-flying overly idealistic rhetoric to say that we need to truly re-engage each other, and understand that our government is US. Our democracy, our future depends on it. Barack Obama believes this, and Hillary doesn't come close. Words and ideas DO matter. The ability to move a crowd, the courage to say things that no politicians think can be said - that is not just charisma - that is not just "yeah he does speak well" - that is gifted leadership. That is what we need.
Look at what the rhetoric of fear has done. The power of an idea that becomes an emotion, and then a reality. Why not the rhetoric of hope? of unity? The other side has had control of words and ideas for too long.
It matters that we collectively remember that we are supposed to be, that we HAVE to be looking out for each other, for a social good, because that is where good policy comes from. Inspiration matters and character matters. We need a truly transformative leader and we are fortunate beyond all belief to have one running for president.
That is why I am voting for Barack Obama.
***
You have to see this is you haven't. Michelle Obama's speech at UCLA rally is badass. She is speaking without a script. Here is the best link I could find for it:
http://barackfuture.com/2008/02/04/michelle-obamas-amazing-speech-at-ucla/
the whole event can be found on CSPAN:
rtsp://video.c-span.org/archive/c08/c08_020308_obama.rm?start=0:35:37
Highlights of Michelle's speech if you don't have time to watch it:
1) Barack's state legislature and community organizing experience translate into a clear understanding of how federal policy affects local and state realities. Having worked as an advocate at a local coalition, that is HUGE.
2) Michelle and Barack are only 3 years out of paying off their education debt, and they are only out because of his book sales. No trust funds. No sense of entitlement.
3) If you didn't know, he was first African-American president of the Harvard Law Review. He is utterly capable.
AND if you haven't seen the Yes We Can Video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjXyqcx-mYY
the artist Will.I.am was inspired by the speech, called his friends, made the video 2 days and posted it independently on the internet.
"Nothing can stand in the way of million of voices calling for change."
Vote tomorrow or when it's your turn. If you dig it, get online, get on the phone, SPREAD THE WORD. Put yourself out there, that is what this will take.
"In the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope."
Peace,
Erin
Monday, January 21, 2008
Bad Decisions.
I don’t know what was with me today.
I’m usually a pretty decisive guy, in control of things. A risk-taker in some aspects, which occasionally backfires for sure, but still a good decision maker overall.
Not today.
I think I made about 20 decisions today. And about 20 of the wrong ones. And the day’s not over yet, so at this rate who knows where and in what kind of condition I’ll end up this night.
Setting: Vancouver, BC, Canada…8:50am
Destination: Seattle-Tacoma International Airport, 1:57pm flight
I’m doing good at this point, and as the weather is absolutely glorious in Vancouver, I decide to cruise up towards downtown for one last glimpse. Knowing my fascination with airplanes, I get diverted driving by the airport to watch a few planes come in. What I think is 5 or 10 minutes turns into 30. Stayed too long. Bad decision.
So then I decide I’m already halfway to Queen Elizabeth Park, a pretty cool vantage point of Vancouver, the downtown skyline and the snow-capped mountains beyond. As I’m getting closer and closer to the park, I even turned off at one point thinking “this is a bad idea.” But I can’t leave well enough alone. The guy in me takes over, and I figure “hey, I’ve already come this far.” So off towards Queen E I continue. Bad decision.
I get to the park, wander around for 10 minutes, and then start to get a sense of urgency. But I really have to pee at this point. And this is vulgar, so divert your eyes now if you’re squeamish, but peeing outside is just SO much more satisfying. So I decide to run back by the airport, rather than getting straight on the freeway, to get one more glimpse of the city, the airplanes and the beautiful day. And if I go to the park I have in mind, I can get a nice good pee in off in the bushes. Bad decision. The pee was great. But that’s 15 more minutes down the drain.
Finally I’m (trying) to make a bee line for Seattle, and it’s after 10am. I need gas though, which is more expensive in Canada by far. I pull off at the first gas station I see, which happens to be right in front of some train tracks. I haven’t seen a train EVER in Vancouver. So I’m getting some gas, and RIGHT when I pull out, the red lights flash, the bells chime, and the gates come down. Two locomotives drone by, followed by about 100 cars….ten more minutes down the drain. And then I see another gas station, cheaper too, about 10 feet beyond the tracks. If I went there initially, I saved ten minutes. And a few bucks. Bad decision.
By this point I’m on the freeway, speeding towards the border. I am approaching the last break-off point where you can either stay on the highway and cross at the Peace Arch, or exit and go to the truck crossing (Pacific Crossing). My gut is telling me that the truck crossing is quicker, but I hesitate just a SECOND too long, and the exit is gone. So I’m stuck at the Peace Arch, which ends up taking about 30 minutes longer than the “10 minute wait” advertised at Pacific Crossing. Bad decision. Even in line at the border, I choose the ONE lane where the customs officer is opening every trunk…so cars are whizzing by me on both sides. Bad decision.
Cruising now, trying to ignore the obvious bucking of displeasure by my rented Dodge Charger for doing 90, and it’s getting time for gas again. And I REALLY gotta pee. I’m trying to hold it until JUST a close enough distance to where I won’t have to fill up again before I return it in Seattle…since by this point I’ll be lucky to have time for ONE gas stop, with no shot at two. I finally see an exit that looks good with the gas sign, just hoping the station is right off the exit. Bad decision. I get off, wait at a red light behind a log truck for about TEN minutes, and then find that the gas station has NO GAS! So I wait another 5 minutes at the light, SPEED back onto the freeway to the next exit, where I fill up (relatively quickly).
So I’m approaching Seattle, and I’m coming up to the I-5/405 split. Both go the same place, with 5 cutting through downtown and maybe a mile or two shorter. Intuitively I’m thinking that 405 would be best though, because it’s less urban…but I stick with 5. Bad decision. About 10 minutes later I come to a dead stop. Traffic.
Now I’m pretty much resigned to missing my flight, and my gut is telling me to just relax, take the car downtown (I already paid for the whole day, anyway), and just check out Seattle and relax. But I’m still stubborn, holding out hope of making the flight, so I continue speeding to the rental car place, and return the car. Bad decision. I actually got in the VAN from the rental car place to the airport at 1:30pm—for a 1:57pm flight. By the time I arrive at the airport, it’s 1:40. I’m thinking MAYBE if I carry on my bags, I can run to catch the flight. I call Alaska Airlines, and the agent says there’s no cut-off with the e-check in kiosks as long as I’m not checking bags. That sounds strange to me, but I believe her anyway. Bad decision. When I go to check in at 1:40pm, it tells me I’m too late.
So now I’m stuck with 11 hours to kill until the next flight, with no more car, and not a damn thing to do. I work out my flight arrangements so I can get a flight that night (which will cost me an unnecessary $120 plus a night’s sleep), and then decide to go back to the hotel I stayed at last time I was here to chill in the lobby and get some work done (where I’m writing this blog). Finally a decent decision.
But the day’s not over. Around 6pm I’m starting to get hungry. I could eat at the bar in the hotel, or go across the street, where there’s a Jack-in-the-Box, a Denny’s, and some random diner. I decide to go to Denny’s. Bad decision. Not only is it the most expensive Denny’s I’ve ever seen…the salad that comes with my meal is absolutely DOUSED in thousand island dressing, to the point where I couldn’t even eat it. Turns out, the food at the hotel was just as cheap, and much better.
So not only is the food decision poor, but the time management is too. I find out that the hotel has a shuttle to the SouthCenter Mall, which is close by. If I was thinking of this earlier, I could have gone over there around 3 or 5, chilled until 5 or 7, gotten some food, and seen more of the place (the shuttle is every two hours). But since I waste my time and money at Denny’s, I end up with only enough time to catch the 7pm shuttle…with a pick-up at 9. Not only would I not want to spend that much time there…but also that return is going to be cutting it too close to my alternate flight. And I’m sure as hell not missing another flight today. So because of this (hopefully last) bad decision for today, I’m sitting here writing this blog instead. Which probably is a bad decision, as I’m probably missing some million-dollar giveaway shopping spree/wet t-shirt contest at the mall or something.
This sucks.
Oh, and I decided to pass up the Jack-in-the-Box Oreo shake after dinner, too. Which could be a bad decision or a good decision. Guess the jury’s still out on that one. But I know which one I’d bet on…
I’m usually a pretty decisive guy, in control of things. A risk-taker in some aspects, which occasionally backfires for sure, but still a good decision maker overall.
Not today.
I think I made about 20 decisions today. And about 20 of the wrong ones. And the day’s not over yet, so at this rate who knows where and in what kind of condition I’ll end up this night.
Setting: Vancouver, BC, Canada…8:50am
Destination: Seattle-Tacoma International Airport, 1:57pm flight
I’m doing good at this point, and as the weather is absolutely glorious in Vancouver, I decide to cruise up towards downtown for one last glimpse. Knowing my fascination with airplanes, I get diverted driving by the airport to watch a few planes come in. What I think is 5 or 10 minutes turns into 30. Stayed too long. Bad decision.
So then I decide I’m already halfway to Queen Elizabeth Park, a pretty cool vantage point of Vancouver, the downtown skyline and the snow-capped mountains beyond. As I’m getting closer and closer to the park, I even turned off at one point thinking “this is a bad idea.” But I can’t leave well enough alone. The guy in me takes over, and I figure “hey, I’ve already come this far.” So off towards Queen E I continue. Bad decision.
I get to the park, wander around for 10 minutes, and then start to get a sense of urgency. But I really have to pee at this point. And this is vulgar, so divert your eyes now if you’re squeamish, but peeing outside is just SO much more satisfying. So I decide to run back by the airport, rather than getting straight on the freeway, to get one more glimpse of the city, the airplanes and the beautiful day. And if I go to the park I have in mind, I can get a nice good pee in off in the bushes. Bad decision. The pee was great. But that’s 15 more minutes down the drain.
Finally I’m (trying) to make a bee line for Seattle, and it’s after 10am. I need gas though, which is more expensive in Canada by far. I pull off at the first gas station I see, which happens to be right in front of some train tracks. I haven’t seen a train EVER in Vancouver. So I’m getting some gas, and RIGHT when I pull out, the red lights flash, the bells chime, and the gates come down. Two locomotives drone by, followed by about 100 cars….ten more minutes down the drain. And then I see another gas station, cheaper too, about 10 feet beyond the tracks. If I went there initially, I saved ten minutes. And a few bucks. Bad decision.
By this point I’m on the freeway, speeding towards the border. I am approaching the last break-off point where you can either stay on the highway and cross at the Peace Arch, or exit and go to the truck crossing (Pacific Crossing). My gut is telling me that the truck crossing is quicker, but I hesitate just a SECOND too long, and the exit is gone. So I’m stuck at the Peace Arch, which ends up taking about 30 minutes longer than the “10 minute wait” advertised at Pacific Crossing. Bad decision. Even in line at the border, I choose the ONE lane where the customs officer is opening every trunk…so cars are whizzing by me on both sides. Bad decision.
Cruising now, trying to ignore the obvious bucking of displeasure by my rented Dodge Charger for doing 90, and it’s getting time for gas again. And I REALLY gotta pee. I’m trying to hold it until JUST a close enough distance to where I won’t have to fill up again before I return it in Seattle…since by this point I’ll be lucky to have time for ONE gas stop, with no shot at two. I finally see an exit that looks good with the gas sign, just hoping the station is right off the exit. Bad decision. I get off, wait at a red light behind a log truck for about TEN minutes, and then find that the gas station has NO GAS! So I wait another 5 minutes at the light, SPEED back onto the freeway to the next exit, where I fill up (relatively quickly).
So I’m approaching Seattle, and I’m coming up to the I-5/405 split. Both go the same place, with 5 cutting through downtown and maybe a mile or two shorter. Intuitively I’m thinking that 405 would be best though, because it’s less urban…but I stick with 5. Bad decision. About 10 minutes later I come to a dead stop. Traffic.
Now I’m pretty much resigned to missing my flight, and my gut is telling me to just relax, take the car downtown (I already paid for the whole day, anyway), and just check out Seattle and relax. But I’m still stubborn, holding out hope of making the flight, so I continue speeding to the rental car place, and return the car. Bad decision. I actually got in the VAN from the rental car place to the airport at 1:30pm—for a 1:57pm flight. By the time I arrive at the airport, it’s 1:40. I’m thinking MAYBE if I carry on my bags, I can run to catch the flight. I call Alaska Airlines, and the agent says there’s no cut-off with the e-check in kiosks as long as I’m not checking bags. That sounds strange to me, but I believe her anyway. Bad decision. When I go to check in at 1:40pm, it tells me I’m too late.
So now I’m stuck with 11 hours to kill until the next flight, with no more car, and not a damn thing to do. I work out my flight arrangements so I can get a flight that night (which will cost me an unnecessary $120 plus a night’s sleep), and then decide to go back to the hotel I stayed at last time I was here to chill in the lobby and get some work done (where I’m writing this blog). Finally a decent decision.
But the day’s not over. Around 6pm I’m starting to get hungry. I could eat at the bar in the hotel, or go across the street, where there’s a Jack-in-the-Box, a Denny’s, and some random diner. I decide to go to Denny’s. Bad decision. Not only is it the most expensive Denny’s I’ve ever seen…the salad that comes with my meal is absolutely DOUSED in thousand island dressing, to the point where I couldn’t even eat it. Turns out, the food at the hotel was just as cheap, and much better.
So not only is the food decision poor, but the time management is too. I find out that the hotel has a shuttle to the SouthCenter Mall, which is close by. If I was thinking of this earlier, I could have gone over there around 3 or 5, chilled until 5 or 7, gotten some food, and seen more of the place (the shuttle is every two hours). But since I waste my time and money at Denny’s, I end up with only enough time to catch the 7pm shuttle…with a pick-up at 9. Not only would I not want to spend that much time there…but also that return is going to be cutting it too close to my alternate flight. And I’m sure as hell not missing another flight today. So because of this (hopefully last) bad decision for today, I’m sitting here writing this blog instead. Which probably is a bad decision, as I’m probably missing some million-dollar giveaway shopping spree/wet t-shirt contest at the mall or something.
This sucks.
Oh, and I decided to pass up the Jack-in-the-Box Oreo shake after dinner, too. Which could be a bad decision or a good decision. Guess the jury’s still out on that one. But I know which one I’d bet on…
Monday, November 26, 2007
Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
I must be getting old. So I have this box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch in the cabinet, becuase I sometimes just can't pass it up in the grocery store. The box looks too appealing and lures me in. But I usually stick with Cheerios.
So it just so happens that there's no Cherrios in the cupboard this morning, so I finally open up that box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch that's been sitting there for a rainy day. I pour the cereal, I pour milk on the cereal, and I start to savor the cinnamony goodness...except I find it kind of nasty. Whoa. Where did that come from? Anyway, I guess I just can't do it any more...
The question is, is my relationship with Cookie Crisp over too? Do they still even make Cookie Crisp?
So it just so happens that there's no Cherrios in the cupboard this morning, so I finally open up that box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch that's been sitting there for a rainy day. I pour the cereal, I pour milk on the cereal, and I start to savor the cinnamony goodness...except I find it kind of nasty. Whoa. Where did that come from? Anyway, I guess I just can't do it any more...
The question is, is my relationship with Cookie Crisp over too? Do they still even make Cookie Crisp?
Saturday, August 04, 2007
I'm Going to Sleep More
Sounds: T.I. vs. T.I.P./"You Know What It Is"
So it's been about 8 months since my last entry on this thing...what the hell have I been doing? Well, to be honest, I've had a few instances where I had something to write, but it's too damn complicated to log into this blogger thing. So I sleep instead. But now I noticed I can log into this through my gmail, so maybe I'll get on here more.
At the moment, I'm in the midst of another mini-whirlwind of traveling for work--Boston, NYC and Houston in the past two weeks and Doha, Qatar next week. I had to go to Boston for a trade show called NBTA, where a lot of airlines, hotels and other related businesses had booths. This was our booth for Qatar Airways, which was pretty tight:
Some other pics of the convention, including Colin Powell (I'll reserve my judgment of him here) speaking:
This was basically a 4-day networking event/party. Some of the airlines and hotels were giving away drinks at their booths (i.e. Japan Airlines giving away sake, Virgin Atlantic giving away champagne, and some of the hotel properties giving away drinks unique to their regions). And then after business hours, there'd be invites to parties hosted by airlines at clubs and lounges...all open bars, etc. It was nuts. Being one of the youngest folks there, I kind of felt like it was a convention designed to give a bunch of old industry buddies the chance to re-live their youth for a few days...but that's cool. There was still business getting done, and everybody seemed to have a good time (except the people from my company who came over from overseas, but that's another story for another day). There was even a golf tournament, which marked my first time ever playing 18 holes on a regulation course, as well as the debut of my new straw hat:
Coordinating the marketing stuff for Qatar, I had a lot to do, but since I got there a few days early to oversee the construction of our booth, I still was able to find time to explore Boston...which is a GREAT place in the summer. Whether doing some sightseeing, shopping, just chillin' at the river looking at the clouds or clowning around with my friend who came up from NY one afternoon because she had never been to Boston, I had a good time. Here's some pics:
Do you see the bird and the plane in this one?
There was also some good food involved (stuffed lobster)...
...and some good friends...
Oh, and someone told me during the week that I had bags under my eyes. That kind of caught me off guard...I'm not tryna look like Jeff Van Gundy in two years. So I made a vow, to ATTEMPT to get a full 7 hours of sleep every night. Eight just wouldn't happen. But considering I'm about about 5 now, I think I could get close to 7 if I put my mind to it...
On that note, it's nap time...but let me leave you with by FAR the coolest thing I saw in Boston all week:
(Sorry...I had a video to upload but it's too big for YouTube...)
Yours truly.
So it's been about 8 months since my last entry on this thing...what the hell have I been doing? Well, to be honest, I've had a few instances where I had something to write, but it's too damn complicated to log into this blogger thing. So I sleep instead. But now I noticed I can log into this through my gmail, so maybe I'll get on here more.
At the moment, I'm in the midst of another mini-whirlwind of traveling for work--Boston, NYC and Houston in the past two weeks and Doha, Qatar next week. I had to go to Boston for a trade show called NBTA, where a lot of airlines, hotels and other related businesses had booths. This was our booth for Qatar Airways, which was pretty tight:
Some other pics of the convention, including Colin Powell (I'll reserve my judgment of him here) speaking:
This was basically a 4-day networking event/party. Some of the airlines and hotels were giving away drinks at their booths (i.e. Japan Airlines giving away sake, Virgin Atlantic giving away champagne, and some of the hotel properties giving away drinks unique to their regions). And then after business hours, there'd be invites to parties hosted by airlines at clubs and lounges...all open bars, etc. It was nuts. Being one of the youngest folks there, I kind of felt like it was a convention designed to give a bunch of old industry buddies the chance to re-live their youth for a few days...but that's cool. There was still business getting done, and everybody seemed to have a good time (except the people from my company who came over from overseas, but that's another story for another day). There was even a golf tournament, which marked my first time ever playing 18 holes on a regulation course, as well as the debut of my new straw hat:
Coordinating the marketing stuff for Qatar, I had a lot to do, but since I got there a few days early to oversee the construction of our booth, I still was able to find time to explore Boston...which is a GREAT place in the summer. Whether doing some sightseeing, shopping, just chillin' at the river looking at the clouds or clowning around with my friend who came up from NY one afternoon because she had never been to Boston, I had a good time. Here's some pics:
Do you see the bird and the plane in this one?
There was also some good food involved (stuffed lobster)...
...and some good friends...
Oh, and someone told me during the week that I had bags under my eyes. That kind of caught me off guard...I'm not tryna look like Jeff Van Gundy in two years. So I made a vow, to ATTEMPT to get a full 7 hours of sleep every night. Eight just wouldn't happen. But considering I'm about about 5 now, I think I could get close to 7 if I put my mind to it...
On that note, it's nap time...but let me leave you with by FAR the coolest thing I saw in Boston all week:
(Sorry...I had a video to upload but it's too big for YouTube...)
Yours truly.
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
THIS is why I don't l isten to the radio...
From the Washington Post's article on Ciara's new album:
"I just wanted to make sure we didn't just get a bunch of songs from people that work with any other R&B artist," says Ethiopia Habtemariam, vice president of urban creative affairs at Universal Music Publishing Group, who serves as the [Ciara] album's A&R. "Ciara was part of every track that was conceived."
Observation #1: The guest appearances include Pharrell, Lil' Jon, and Will.I.Am. Are these really artists who don't work with other R&B artists?!?
Observation #2: Think about the last part of that quote..."Ciara was part of every track that was conceived." Since when is this a ground-breaking concept!?!? I mean, it is HER album, isn't it? That's incredible to know, that she was a part of making her own "SOLO" album! Haha...I hope I'm not the only one who finds the A&R's need to emphasize this point funny...
Observation #3: Ciara looks good (NO dispute there). And that makes Observations #1 and #2 completely irrelevant!
"I just wanted to make sure we didn't just get a bunch of songs from people that work with any other R&B artist," says Ethiopia Habtemariam, vice president of urban creative affairs at Universal Music Publishing Group, who serves as the [Ciara] album's A&R. "Ciara was part of every track that was conceived."
Observation #1: The guest appearances include Pharrell, Lil' Jon, and Will.I.Am. Are these really artists who don't work with other R&B artists?!?
Observation #2: Think about the last part of that quote..."Ciara was part of every track that was conceived." Since when is this a ground-breaking concept!?!? I mean, it is HER album, isn't it? That's incredible to know, that she was a part of making her own "SOLO" album! Haha...I hope I'm not the only one who finds the A&R's need to emphasize this point funny...
Observation #3: Ciara looks good (NO dispute there). And that makes Observations #1 and #2 completely irrelevant!
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Why I Love the 'Tilly
(from November 26, 2006)
So check it out...I went to my high school's football game on Saturday, and I have to say it reminded me of why I'm so proud of where I'm from (I know most of you have probably heard me brag about Chantilly and the big V-A). For some background, my school hasn't even made the football playoffs since 1996, when some of the guys in my Top 8 led us to a state championship...and they were 0-10 just two years ago. But all of the sudden they started ballin' this year, and found themselves in the region championship against vaunted neighborhood rival and undefeated Westfield. Second offensive play of the game, the starting QB is literally helicoptered out of the stadium, nobody knowing exactly what's going on other than the fact that he's laying on the field for like 20 minutes. Well, this backup comes in and just does an unbelievable job, playing with confidence and keeping Chantilly in the game. We were down the whole game, but this kid engineers a GUTSY last minute drive to win the game with :14 seconds left. Just to see the 10-15 members of our '96 championship team that were there to support getting all excited at the end...that was priceless, man. A perfect day, perfect weather, jam-packed stadium, lively atmosphere, high drama and a courageous performance from the underdog 'Tilly squad...it reminded me of why I was proud to be a part of that team in 1996 and why I'm still proud to represent the Tilly in '06!!
So check it out...I went to my high school's football game on Saturday, and I have to say it reminded me of why I'm so proud of where I'm from (I know most of you have probably heard me brag about Chantilly and the big V-A). For some background, my school hasn't even made the football playoffs since 1996, when some of the guys in my Top 8 led us to a state championship...and they were 0-10 just two years ago. But all of the sudden they started ballin' this year, and found themselves in the region championship against vaunted neighborhood rival and undefeated Westfield. Second offensive play of the game, the starting QB is literally helicoptered out of the stadium, nobody knowing exactly what's going on other than the fact that he's laying on the field for like 20 minutes. Well, this backup comes in and just does an unbelievable job, playing with confidence and keeping Chantilly in the game. We were down the whole game, but this kid engineers a GUTSY last minute drive to win the game with :14 seconds left. Just to see the 10-15 members of our '96 championship team that were there to support getting all excited at the end...that was priceless, man. A perfect day, perfect weather, jam-packed stadium, lively atmosphere, high drama and a courageous performance from the underdog 'Tilly squad...it reminded me of why I was proud to be a part of that team in 1996 and why I'm still proud to represent the Tilly in '06!!
Check out this REUB review...
(from November 13, 2006)
Alright, this blog is from my Myspace page, but I just had to type up a quick pitch for my boy who's trying to do big things making music. Now, this is one of my best friends, mind you, so yeah, I may be somewhat biased. But I'm telling you, this music is legit, and I'll stick to that statement whether your playlist is typically AC/DC or Amerie, Bob Marley or Bob Dylan, Justin Timberlake or Jimmy Buffett...and I wouldn't go out of my way to say that if I didn't mean it. So if your speakers aren't on, unmute them for a sec, and go to his myspace page! (www.myspace.com/reubmuzik2) If that song "All I Know That's Real" is up there, give it a listen.
I'm pasting below a review I wrote in 2002 for some local publications of REUB's first album, Pair-a-Dice. Check it out...
R.E.U.B.: PAIR-A-DICE
Heaven on Earth Productions
Listen to R.E.U.B.'s debut album, Pair-A-Dice, once, and you'll understand the local hype proclaiming the enigmatic emcee as the newest kid on Virginia's blossoming hip-hop scene. Listen to Pair-A-Dice again, and you'll realize that this potent lyricist and producer isn't really a kid at all, but the rhythmic shell of an artist who has been through a lifetime's worth of contradictory experiences and manifests them with precision.
While his incinerating flow and ambidextrous beats conjure an image of industry studs such as DJ Premier, Common and Nas rolled into one, it is R.E.U.B.'s self-examination and thoughtful perspectives that make his debut recording stand out. In laying down his turbulent life in no unclear terms, R.E.U.B. proves that the personal struggles, triumphs, vices and virtues of an artist's rough and tumble upbringings can be expressed on wax with a realistic--not outlandish--demeanor.
Pair-A-Dice, the first release from R.E.U.B.'s independent Heaven On Earth Productions label, is both positive and negative, idealistic and vogue, grave and light-hearted. It's an honest self-portrait of a complex man that has experienced the best and worst of life, a good-natured realist that knows right from wrong and does wrong anyway. But through the trials of a constant internal struggle between life's competing extremities, R.E.U.B. steadily manages to find the silver lining amongst potentially depressing realities, and emits his optimism forcefully through a witty and baby-oil smooth vocal delivery.
The album also showcases R.E.U.B.'s production ability in several different contexts. Most of the production behind Pair-A-Dice exudes a rugged New York street style featuring heavy doses of chop sampling and vocal highlights, but R.E.U.B. also experiments with a variety of deviating formulas--an electric guitar, bass-heavy West Coast licks, a conga, 110 beats-per-minute sprints and 60 beats-per-minute drawls.
R.E.U.B.'s equally creative lyricism and production adds up to a polished finish product that constantly changes pace, taking the listener through a series of twists and turns throughout Pair-A-Dice, which R.E.U.B. wrote, produced, mixed, performed and arranged.
Some of the album's strongest songs showcase what R.E.U.B. has picked up from his ever-evolving influences. "All My Peoples" is R.E.U.B.'s answer to Common's "Sixth Sense," an ode to hip-hop culture in which he expresses appreciation for friends and family, and more significantly, a passion and willingness to go to any length to succeed and conquer the business of hip-hop. The album's first single, "Gotcha," provides an early left jab with a comedic, punchline-heavy delivery over a breakneck dance beat a la Jay-Z's "I Just Wanna Love U," and "Supreme," the album's most invigorating track, lays down an infectious, Premier-inspired rhythm that R.E.U.B. tears to shreds with a veteran's claw.
But while the roots and influences of some of Pair-A-Dice's offerings can be clearly traced, R.E.U.B. also explores different avenues repeatedly throughout the album, venturing into sounds and topics seldom examined by the hip-hop world. "D'Hydrated Water," Pair-A-Dice's most thought-provoking song, serves as the album's best reflection of its creator's social and psychological consciousness. Over a mellow, melodic bassline, R.E.U.B. reflects on topics ranging from the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks to nonsensical "keeping it real" claims to character flaws he sees in himself.
Additionally, R.E.U.B. discusses the burdensome baggage that comes along with accomplishment in "Still Life," pays tribute to the World Trade Center victims through his own experiences in the emotion-driven "This Mourning," and tells the tale of a high school scuffle that left him torn between cliques in "The Legend of Pretty Tony, Pt. 1." And despite the album's primarily serious subject matter, humorous sample-heavy "Sex Ed" highlights sex life in college, serving as just one example of how the album's constantly varying rhythm and scope keeps the listener on edge.
While Pair-A-Dice is 70 consistent minutes of arresting beats and liquid rhyme skills, it is the down-to-earth nature of R.E.U.B.'s tales that distances this effort from so many debut rap albums. R.E.U.B. introspectively examines real-life responsibilities in a direct-but-subtle way, and precisely tailors his beats to compliment each song's subject matter. And as insightful as much of R.E.U.B.'s content is, he balances it with several raw, playful tracks that merely serve as a battleground for his razor-sharp tongue, and underscore his ambitious declaration that he'll do whatever it takes to "stand out like smokers with five minutes of break left."
Balance is the defining characteristic of Pair-A-Dice. In painting a no-stones-unturned self-portrait, R.E.U.B. simultaneously thinks out loud, dreams out loud, steams out loud, laughs out loud and cries out loud. He's not a thug who'll pop off at the mouth about the "in" thing of the day, and he's not an idealist who's out to save the hip-hop world by preaching about what ought to be. He's just R.E.U.B., simple and complex, insightful and foolish, optimistic and bleak, and the contradictions of his well-traveled existence make Pair-A-Dice worth exploring.
--SK
Alright, this blog is from my Myspace page, but I just had to type up a quick pitch for my boy who's trying to do big things making music. Now, this is one of my best friends, mind you, so yeah, I may be somewhat biased. But I'm telling you, this music is legit, and I'll stick to that statement whether your playlist is typically AC/DC or Amerie, Bob Marley or Bob Dylan, Justin Timberlake or Jimmy Buffett...and I wouldn't go out of my way to say that if I didn't mean it. So if your speakers aren't on, unmute them for a sec, and go to his myspace page! (www.myspace.com/reubmuzik2) If that song "All I Know That's Real" is up there, give it a listen.
I'm pasting below a review I wrote in 2002 for some local publications of REUB's first album, Pair-a-Dice. Check it out...
R.E.U.B.: PAIR-A-DICE
Heaven on Earth Productions
Listen to R.E.U.B.'s debut album, Pair-A-Dice, once, and you'll understand the local hype proclaiming the enigmatic emcee as the newest kid on Virginia's blossoming hip-hop scene. Listen to Pair-A-Dice again, and you'll realize that this potent lyricist and producer isn't really a kid at all, but the rhythmic shell of an artist who has been through a lifetime's worth of contradictory experiences and manifests them with precision.
While his incinerating flow and ambidextrous beats conjure an image of industry studs such as DJ Premier, Common and Nas rolled into one, it is R.E.U.B.'s self-examination and thoughtful perspectives that make his debut recording stand out. In laying down his turbulent life in no unclear terms, R.E.U.B. proves that the personal struggles, triumphs, vices and virtues of an artist's rough and tumble upbringings can be expressed on wax with a realistic--not outlandish--demeanor.
Pair-A-Dice, the first release from R.E.U.B.'s independent Heaven On Earth Productions label, is both positive and negative, idealistic and vogue, grave and light-hearted. It's an honest self-portrait of a complex man that has experienced the best and worst of life, a good-natured realist that knows right from wrong and does wrong anyway. But through the trials of a constant internal struggle between life's competing extremities, R.E.U.B. steadily manages to find the silver lining amongst potentially depressing realities, and emits his optimism forcefully through a witty and baby-oil smooth vocal delivery.
The album also showcases R.E.U.B.'s production ability in several different contexts. Most of the production behind Pair-A-Dice exudes a rugged New York street style featuring heavy doses of chop sampling and vocal highlights, but R.E.U.B. also experiments with a variety of deviating formulas--an electric guitar, bass-heavy West Coast licks, a conga, 110 beats-per-minute sprints and 60 beats-per-minute drawls.
R.E.U.B.'s equally creative lyricism and production adds up to a polished finish product that constantly changes pace, taking the listener through a series of twists and turns throughout Pair-A-Dice, which R.E.U.B. wrote, produced, mixed, performed and arranged.
Some of the album's strongest songs showcase what R.E.U.B. has picked up from his ever-evolving influences. "All My Peoples" is R.E.U.B.'s answer to Common's "Sixth Sense," an ode to hip-hop culture in which he expresses appreciation for friends and family, and more significantly, a passion and willingness to go to any length to succeed and conquer the business of hip-hop. The album's first single, "Gotcha," provides an early left jab with a comedic, punchline-heavy delivery over a breakneck dance beat a la Jay-Z's "I Just Wanna Love U," and "Supreme," the album's most invigorating track, lays down an infectious, Premier-inspired rhythm that R.E.U.B. tears to shreds with a veteran's claw.
But while the roots and influences of some of Pair-A-Dice's offerings can be clearly traced, R.E.U.B. also explores different avenues repeatedly throughout the album, venturing into sounds and topics seldom examined by the hip-hop world. "D'Hydrated Water," Pair-A-Dice's most thought-provoking song, serves as the album's best reflection of its creator's social and psychological consciousness. Over a mellow, melodic bassline, R.E.U.B. reflects on topics ranging from the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks to nonsensical "keeping it real" claims to character flaws he sees in himself.
Additionally, R.E.U.B. discusses the burdensome baggage that comes along with accomplishment in "Still Life," pays tribute to the World Trade Center victims through his own experiences in the emotion-driven "This Mourning," and tells the tale of a high school scuffle that left him torn between cliques in "The Legend of Pretty Tony, Pt. 1." And despite the album's primarily serious subject matter, humorous sample-heavy "Sex Ed" highlights sex life in college, serving as just one example of how the album's constantly varying rhythm and scope keeps the listener on edge.
While Pair-A-Dice is 70 consistent minutes of arresting beats and liquid rhyme skills, it is the down-to-earth nature of R.E.U.B.'s tales that distances this effort from so many debut rap albums. R.E.U.B. introspectively examines real-life responsibilities in a direct-but-subtle way, and precisely tailors his beats to compliment each song's subject matter. And as insightful as much of R.E.U.B.'s content is, he balances it with several raw, playful tracks that merely serve as a battleground for his razor-sharp tongue, and underscore his ambitious declaration that he'll do whatever it takes to "stand out like smokers with five minutes of break left."
Balance is the defining characteristic of Pair-A-Dice. In painting a no-stones-unturned self-portrait, R.E.U.B. simultaneously thinks out loud, dreams out loud, steams out loud, laughs out loud and cries out loud. He's not a thug who'll pop off at the mouth about the "in" thing of the day, and he's not an idealist who's out to save the hip-hop world by preaching about what ought to be. He's just R.E.U.B., simple and complex, insightful and foolish, optimistic and bleak, and the contradictions of his well-traveled existence make Pair-A-Dice worth exploring.
--SK
Facing Up
(from November 1, 2006)
There comes a time in every man's life when he has to face up to certain decisions he has made and views of the world he has crafted for himself. I faced one such experience last night. See, I have been known to be a little...well, harsh...at times for things I don't like, whether we're talking popped collars, radio playlists, SUV's, or places where you can't left turn yield on green. Well I would say you could add corny ass actor duos like the Wayans brothers to that list, until I was conned into watching "White Chicks"...and laughed, out loud, at LEAST 10 times. I'll admit it. Triple T-K-A, B-F and all those other acronyms had me rollin'.
It was like watching a game where you can just see the hopes of your squad slip, slipping away with each first down given up. With each additional laugh, I could feel it getting further and further out of my grasp, until that tenth one, when I realized that my set-in-stone world view was forever lost...and I have to give all silly comedies, and all corny actor duos, a fair shake. I'm telling you, it was intense. =)
There comes a time in every man's life when he has to face up to certain decisions he has made and views of the world he has crafted for himself. I faced one such experience last night. See, I have been known to be a little...well, harsh...at times for things I don't like, whether we're talking popped collars, radio playlists, SUV's, or places where you can't left turn yield on green. Well I would say you could add corny ass actor duos like the Wayans brothers to that list, until I was conned into watching "White Chicks"...and laughed, out loud, at LEAST 10 times. I'll admit it. Triple T-K-A, B-F and all those other acronyms had me rollin'.
It was like watching a game where you can just see the hopes of your squad slip, slipping away with each first down given up. With each additional laugh, I could feel it getting further and further out of my grasp, until that tenth one, when I realized that my set-in-stone world view was forever lost...and I have to give all silly comedies, and all corny actor duos, a fair shake. I'm telling you, it was intense. =)
Friday, October 20, 2006
the BIG taboo...
So check it out...I'm in the negotiation stage for a couple of job opportunities. I've always been one to ask for things up front, because to me that's a sign that you're interviewing the company as much as they're interviewing you. If you plan to stay there for awhile, or be really into your work (which is what they'd want), that's fair enough, right? But yo, it's always awkward! For some reason, in our culture, negotiation seems taboo!
(Great quote I read in an article: "There's a limit to what deference can get you.")
Which is why it amazes me that America is one of the most prosperous countries and world's business leaders...we're born sheltered! What is business? Negotiation, right? And whereas people are raised in most countries to negotiate, from a young age, here we're a very accepting culture. We grow up avoiding what we perceive as conflict, or of facing up to things that may involve any sort of confrontation, with things, people, ourselves...whatever. We're told what the price is, and we pay it or not. SO uncomfortable with bartering and negotiating, with facing up to things. We are raised to feel bad for doing so, or for doing things like asking for something that's supposed to be complimentary anyway. Hell, I was at Denny's a few weeks ago (what 'cha know about that 3am Hearty Ham Slam, yo? That ish is like the ham version of steakum, and you need a damn straw for the eggs...hits the spot tho), with a group of 4, when they told us that the kitchen was backed up. One of the girls I was with asked if they would comp us some salads or something (which is a reasonable enough request given the hour), and I felt bad!! Why?!?!? Sure enough they accommodated us, extra croutons and all. It just made me think about how kids in other countries grow up bartering and negotiating for EVERYthing. That should give them a huge leg up in real-life negotiations, which makes me wonder how WE're the economic power.
So my idea is to raise my young Steves or Stephanies to negotiate. If they want something, they can probably have it..BUT, they are going to have to make a deal with me to get it. It's not about being cheap or unneccesarily difficult or anything like that, but just learning to frame their expectations so as not to settle for subpar things/service/treatment/etc, and learning not to be afraid of confrontation.
Little Man: "Dad, I want the new Jordans!"
Me: "Velcro?!?!? Oh HELL no, son." (j/k...but for real, won't Mike be around retirement age by that time?)
Me (for real): "Hmm...well, make me an offer. How much are they worth to you?"
Little Man: "I'll cut the grass."
Me: "You'll cut the grass once a week for the next year, INCLUDING weed whacking the edges, son, and it better be clean enough for your moms and I to have a picnic on there without even a blanket."
Little Man: "But DAAAAAAAD..."
Me: "What, you want pink boots instead?"
Little Man: (pouty look straightens out REAL quick)..."Six months."
Me: "Nine and you got a deal. And you will SIGN to that, dammit."
Little Man: (rolls to school lookin' SO crispy, and he's ripped b/c I weighed the lawnmover down with sandbags...=)
Okay, so maybe this is a little idealistic, but I believe that raising a youngin' this way would enable him to become a natural negotiator, and raise him to feel comfortable with conflict or with bargaining. In other words, he wouldn't view bargaining or negotiating (aka expecting value for value) as 'conflict', but as a normal part of life. He wouldn't feel bad about being demanding within reason (the squeaky wheel gets the oil, right?), knowing the value of his lawnmowing skills, but he'd have to be raised to be respectful as well. Of course that's important. And with girls, maybe it would keep them from putting up with shit from dudes as they get older. But I would think raising children this way would also teach them the value of things, and to know that whatever they want they can get, IF they going are willing to work for it. No free handouts. And they'll learn to negotiate, EXPECT value for value, and learn the true value of things without being afraid of confrontation.
Just a thought.
(Great quote I read in an article: "There's a limit to what deference can get you.")
Which is why it amazes me that America is one of the most prosperous countries and world's business leaders...we're born sheltered! What is business? Negotiation, right? And whereas people are raised in most countries to negotiate, from a young age, here we're a very accepting culture. We grow up avoiding what we perceive as conflict, or of facing up to things that may involve any sort of confrontation, with things, people, ourselves...whatever. We're told what the price is, and we pay it or not. SO uncomfortable with bartering and negotiating, with facing up to things. We are raised to feel bad for doing so, or for doing things like asking for something that's supposed to be complimentary anyway. Hell, I was at Denny's a few weeks ago (what 'cha know about that 3am Hearty Ham Slam, yo? That ish is like the ham version of steakum, and you need a damn straw for the eggs...hits the spot tho), with a group of 4, when they told us that the kitchen was backed up. One of the girls I was with asked if they would comp us some salads or something (which is a reasonable enough request given the hour), and I felt bad!! Why?!?!? Sure enough they accommodated us, extra croutons and all. It just made me think about how kids in other countries grow up bartering and negotiating for EVERYthing. That should give them a huge leg up in real-life negotiations, which makes me wonder how WE're the economic power.
So my idea is to raise my young Steves or Stephanies to negotiate. If they want something, they can probably have it..BUT, they are going to have to make a deal with me to get it. It's not about being cheap or unneccesarily difficult or anything like that, but just learning to frame their expectations so as not to settle for subpar things/service/treatment/etc, and learning not to be afraid of confrontation.
Little Man: "Dad, I want the new Jordans!"
Me: "Velcro?!?!? Oh HELL no, son." (j/k...but for real, won't Mike be around retirement age by that time?)
Me (for real): "Hmm...well, make me an offer. How much are they worth to you?"
Little Man: "I'll cut the grass."
Me: "You'll cut the grass once a week for the next year, INCLUDING weed whacking the edges, son, and it better be clean enough for your moms and I to have a picnic on there without even a blanket."
Little Man: "But DAAAAAAAD..."
Me: "What, you want pink boots instead?"
Little Man: (pouty look straightens out REAL quick)..."Six months."
Me: "Nine and you got a deal. And you will SIGN to that, dammit."
Little Man: (rolls to school lookin' SO crispy, and he's ripped b/c I weighed the lawnmover down with sandbags...=)
Okay, so maybe this is a little idealistic, but I believe that raising a youngin' this way would enable him to become a natural negotiator, and raise him to feel comfortable with conflict or with bargaining. In other words, he wouldn't view bargaining or negotiating (aka expecting value for value) as 'conflict', but as a normal part of life. He wouldn't feel bad about being demanding within reason (the squeaky wheel gets the oil, right?), knowing the value of his lawnmowing skills, but he'd have to be raised to be respectful as well. Of course that's important. And with girls, maybe it would keep them from putting up with shit from dudes as they get older. But I would think raising children this way would also teach them the value of things, and to know that whatever they want they can get, IF they going are willing to work for it. No free handouts. And they'll learn to negotiate, EXPECT value for value, and learn the true value of things without being afraid of confrontation.
Just a thought.
Monday, October 02, 2006
Friday, September 29, 2006
The Projects (Ladies!).
You know what I'm talking about. How many times have you seen (guys) a girl that you're cool with sticking by a complete loser? How many guys (girls) have you stuck by knowing damn well you should not have, even at the time?
Ahh, that perceived need to nurture. Cycle as follows:
1. Girl (good) meets boy. Probably bad boy, plays-by-his-own-rules type. Girl likey.
2. Girl and boy hook up/get together/whatever you want to call it.
3. Girl has fun with boy. Boy completely carefree, basically just trying to get some tail.
4. Girl realizey that boy deal drugs/dropped out of school/spends all of his cash on his car/etc. (NOTE: not judging anyone, but hear me out...)
5. Boy has no intention to change (and that's cool, do you)...BUT...girl see "flaws" in boy that SHE must take responsibility for.
6. Girl encourage boy to finish school/find a real job/start saving money/etc.
7. Boy out of money, starts to stay over at girl's place/eat girl's food/etc.
8. Girl sees more flaws that SHE must take responsibility for.
9. Boy gives lip service to going back to school/finding a job/saving money/etc.
10. Boy has no discipline to do/intention of doing said things.
11. Girl continue to offer apartment/food/attention/sex.
12. Girl continue to see flaws that SHE must take responsibility for.
13. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
14. Girl continue to see flaws that SHE must take responsibility for. Turns up effort.
15. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
16. Girl fucked by this point.
17. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
18. Girl's friends tell girl that she should move on, boy no good for her.
19. Girl stick up for boy, makes excuses for boy and says "intentions" are good.
20. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
21. (Boy very comfortable in this situation)
22. Girl start to think that maybe she should move on.
23. Girl feel sorry for boy by this point though, feels bad about leaving him.
24. Girl continue to see flaws that SHE must take responsibility for.
25. Girl feel trapped.
26. Girl already invested so much effort, completely emotionally invested by this point.
27. Girl grow dependent on guy that was originally dependent on her.
28. Problem: Guy have nothing to offer girl.
29. Girl think he will still change, wants to see return on her investment.
30. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
31. Girl and boy have good sex.
32. Girl and boy talk, boy pay lip service to going back to school/finding job/etc.
33. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
34. (You get the cycle by now...)
See it all the time. And it never seems to work out in the end, but I guess it's just something that a lot of girls must go through and learn for themselves. At the end the day, a relationship will NEVER work if it is fostered (from the beginning) on dependency, unless it's completely mutual. The minute your justification for being with/staying with someone is that you feel sorry for them, you should not be in a relationship with them. It won't last. Both people have to have something besides sex or money to offer the other.
Giving is natural, and I've heard girls tell me that they don't care about getting anything back. They just want to give of themselves. But that isn't reality, because then they'll never get the emotional/spiritual/mental growth that is fostered by the other person in a mature relationship, over the LONG term.
Think about it...
Ahh, that perceived need to nurture. Cycle as follows:
1. Girl (good) meets boy. Probably bad boy, plays-by-his-own-rules type. Girl likey.
2. Girl and boy hook up/get together/whatever you want to call it.
3. Girl has fun with boy. Boy completely carefree, basically just trying to get some tail.
4. Girl realizey that boy deal drugs/dropped out of school/spends all of his cash on his car/etc. (NOTE: not judging anyone, but hear me out...)
5. Boy has no intention to change (and that's cool, do you)...BUT...girl see "flaws" in boy that SHE must take responsibility for.
6. Girl encourage boy to finish school/find a real job/start saving money/etc.
7. Boy out of money, starts to stay over at girl's place/eat girl's food/etc.
8. Girl sees more flaws that SHE must take responsibility for.
9. Boy gives lip service to going back to school/finding a job/saving money/etc.
10. Boy has no discipline to do/intention of doing said things.
11. Girl continue to offer apartment/food/attention/sex.
12. Girl continue to see flaws that SHE must take responsibility for.
13. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
14. Girl continue to see flaws that SHE must take responsibility for. Turns up effort.
15. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
16. Girl fucked by this point.
17. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
18. Girl's friends tell girl that she should move on, boy no good for her.
19. Girl stick up for boy, makes excuses for boy and says "intentions" are good.
20. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
21. (Boy very comfortable in this situation)
22. Girl start to think that maybe she should move on.
23. Girl feel sorry for boy by this point though, feels bad about leaving him.
24. Girl continue to see flaws that SHE must take responsibility for.
25. Girl feel trapped.
26. Girl already invested so much effort, completely emotionally invested by this point.
27. Girl grow dependent on guy that was originally dependent on her.
28. Problem: Guy have nothing to offer girl.
29. Girl think he will still change, wants to see return on her investment.
30. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
31. Girl and boy have good sex.
32. Girl and boy talk, boy pay lip service to going back to school/finding job/etc.
33. Boy still no go to school/no find real job/no tiene dinero.
34. (You get the cycle by now...)
See it all the time. And it never seems to work out in the end, but I guess it's just something that a lot of girls must go through and learn for themselves. At the end the day, a relationship will NEVER work if it is fostered (from the beginning) on dependency, unless it's completely mutual. The minute your justification for being with/staying with someone is that you feel sorry for them, you should not be in a relationship with them. It won't last. Both people have to have something besides sex or money to offer the other.
Giving is natural, and I've heard girls tell me that they don't care about getting anything back. They just want to give of themselves. But that isn't reality, because then they'll never get the emotional/spiritual/mental growth that is fostered by the other person in a mature relationship, over the LONG term.
Think about it...
Lyrrrric of the Day, because I like to do this. The Roots: "Clock With No Hands"...
[Verse 2]
I'm like Malcolm, out the window with the weapon out
Searching for somehow to find a minute or a second now
Precious time is money, that I ain't got to mess about
Need it from the horse's mouth or from my eyewitness account.
Lessons with my back to the wall, scoping my session out
Stay a little edgy at times when I ain't stressing bout
Haters don't know shit about me, they're the ones that talk shit
Those that love me set that out, so I ain't got to force quit
'Cause I'm doing better now don't mean I never lost shit
I was married to a state of mind and I divorced it, man
I'm from where brothers moving product from the porches
People locking their doors, clutching to their crosses
The block hot by the law, there ain't too many choices
So what I do is for y'all, there ain't too many voices left
I watch my back, and watch my step
And I might forgive, but I will not forget
[Hook]
People think that I'm crazy, just cause I wanna be alone
You can't depend on friends to help you in a squeeze
We all deal with shit on our own
Sometimes the beef can grow and get out of hand
Yeah, you know it gets full blown
I never said that you mean the world to me
Maybe it's best that you never know
[Verse 3]
Living in turbulent times
The blind leading the blind
Some call it evolution, some say intelligent design
You say you want a revolution, you out of your mizind
Your son's destitute, with his Pops all in the prison
My man's back in a jam, he's like the back of my hand
He's just attracted to scam, he's right back in the can
I'm never sleepwalking, you dig
You get your shuteye
I'm on the first thing in, I'm leaving on the red-eye
My brother's back in rehab, just had another relapse
But in himself it's like he's been fighting his inner jihad
Half telling me nobody's true when they pretend to be that
So closer than friends, that's where I keep my enemies at
To many parties concerned, it's time to live it and learn
Until we're able to grow, forever bridges we'll burn
My thoughts free as a bird, that's just about to emerge
And every action is heard, it speaks louder than words...
I'm like Malcolm, out the window with the weapon out
Searching for somehow to find a minute or a second now
Precious time is money, that I ain't got to mess about
Need it from the horse's mouth or from my eyewitness account.
Lessons with my back to the wall, scoping my session out
Stay a little edgy at times when I ain't stressing bout
Haters don't know shit about me, they're the ones that talk shit
Those that love me set that out, so I ain't got to force quit
'Cause I'm doing better now don't mean I never lost shit
I was married to a state of mind and I divorced it, man
I'm from where brothers moving product from the porches
People locking their doors, clutching to their crosses
The block hot by the law, there ain't too many choices
So what I do is for y'all, there ain't too many voices left
I watch my back, and watch my step
And I might forgive, but I will not forget
[Hook]
People think that I'm crazy, just cause I wanna be alone
You can't depend on friends to help you in a squeeze
We all deal with shit on our own
Sometimes the beef can grow and get out of hand
Yeah, you know it gets full blown
I never said that you mean the world to me
Maybe it's best that you never know
[Verse 3]
Living in turbulent times
The blind leading the blind
Some call it evolution, some say intelligent design
You say you want a revolution, you out of your mizind
Your son's destitute, with his Pops all in the prison
My man's back in a jam, he's like the back of my hand
He's just attracted to scam, he's right back in the can
I'm never sleepwalking, you dig
You get your shuteye
I'm on the first thing in, I'm leaving on the red-eye
My brother's back in rehab, just had another relapse
But in himself it's like he's been fighting his inner jihad
Half telling me nobody's true when they pretend to be that
So closer than friends, that's where I keep my enemies at
To many parties concerned, it's time to live it and learn
Until we're able to grow, forever bridges we'll burn
My thoughts free as a bird, that's just about to emerge
And every action is heard, it speaks louder than words...
Perception.
Life is not that serious, yo! I feel like these people in NYC are all so hardened, rough to the world. It's,umm...interesting.
But for real, have you ever noticed how some people just seem to have that glow about them, always seeming happy, upbeat, together, etc...while others don't? I think people lose sight of the fact that those glowing people, they have the same issues and insecurities that everyone else has. They just know how to mask it, or just learn to accept it, put it aside, and look forward. It's really up to you what kind of person you want to be. Or come across as.
But for real, have you ever noticed how some people just seem to have that glow about them, always seeming happy, upbeat, together, etc...while others don't? I think people lose sight of the fact that those glowing people, they have the same issues and insecurities that everyone else has. They just know how to mask it, or just learn to accept it, put it aside, and look forward. It's really up to you what kind of person you want to be. Or come across as.
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Moment of Clarity.
This past couple of weeks has been interesting. Basically, I've been struggling with a question that now appears to have a simple solution.
Q1: If what you thought you wanted is not all that you thought it would be, would you have the courage to do something about it?
Q1a: Would you really care about what other people thought in making that decision?
I don't know why this wasn't quite clear a month ago, but it seems so simple now. Not that I've ever much cared how my actions were viewed by others as long as I could look myself in the mirror, but for some reason, the first part of that question had me at a loss. We probably all do that though...make decisions not necessarily forward-looking, but under the vast influence of events/experiences leading up to it. But just like in finance, how previous expenditures are a sunk cost that shouldn't impact your profitability decisions looking forward, it seems unnatural to look at our life decisions that way, even though we know it's logical.
Back in April or May, I jumped at this opportunity to move to NYC and work for this great airline, thinking it would open all sorts of doors to the world. Now I'm not even 3 months into the job, and it seems my values have changed, or I'm just learning myself better. In the past 30 days, I've been to Boston, Chicago, Singapore, Los Angeles and San Francisco--all for business. I would have thought that was the life a few months ago, but damn, that's NO life! How are you supposed to have real friendships moving around at that pace? After awhile, it's hard to even appreciate these experiences on your own. In my case, it told me everything I need to know when I came back into the office this week and they asked me to go to Singapore again in 2 weeks. Keep in mind, the thought of international travel is exactly why I wanted to work in this industry, and here I am, the second time they're asking me to go, and I don't even want to! I'm dreading it as a matter of fact, flying right over my birthday to go somewhere 9,535 miles from just about everybody I care about. Nah, that's not much of a life. Experience, yes. Life, no.
Q1: If what you thought you wanted is not all that you thought it would be, would you have the courage to do something about it?
Q1a: Would you really care about what other people thought in making that decision?
I don't know why this wasn't quite clear a month ago, but it seems so simple now. Not that I've ever much cared how my actions were viewed by others as long as I could look myself in the mirror, but for some reason, the first part of that question had me at a loss. We probably all do that though...make decisions not necessarily forward-looking, but under the vast influence of events/experiences leading up to it. But just like in finance, how previous expenditures are a sunk cost that shouldn't impact your profitability decisions looking forward, it seems unnatural to look at our life decisions that way, even though we know it's logical.
Back in April or May, I jumped at this opportunity to move to NYC and work for this great airline, thinking it would open all sorts of doors to the world. Now I'm not even 3 months into the job, and it seems my values have changed, or I'm just learning myself better. In the past 30 days, I've been to Boston, Chicago, Singapore, Los Angeles and San Francisco--all for business. I would have thought that was the life a few months ago, but damn, that's NO life! How are you supposed to have real friendships moving around at that pace? After awhile, it's hard to even appreciate these experiences on your own. In my case, it told me everything I need to know when I came back into the office this week and they asked me to go to Singapore again in 2 weeks. Keep in mind, the thought of international travel is exactly why I wanted to work in this industry, and here I am, the second time they're asking me to go, and I don't even want to! I'm dreading it as a matter of fact, flying right over my birthday to go somewhere 9,535 miles from just about everybody I care about. Nah, that's not much of a life. Experience, yes. Life, no.
Thursday, September 14, 2006
LA LA, Big City of Dreams
(current locale: Marriott Residence Inn Beverley Hills (CA), Room 424)
(current background noise: air conditioner)
Okay, so that last question from the last post. Not like this is rocket science, but I like the happy resolution: You give the car to your best friend, he drives the old woman to the hospital, and you walk off in the rain with your girl. Since she's your girl, it doesn't matter the setting, weather, whatever as long as you have each other. Is that REALLY true?
I have to admit, I've been somewhat sheltered growing up in VA. Not like I haven't seen this or that, but for'real hardened violence/suffering/death...I've been fortunate enough to avoid that. Maybe that's why it caught me off guard the other day when my boy and I pulled up to a stoplight in Fairfax County, and a high speed chase damn near hit us! We had driven right by this cop about 1 minute prior, and the next thing I know as I'm pulling up to the light, I see a cop car swerve up on the grass and come back on the road cutting this guy off in the lane next to us. Then two cops rush out of the car and storm up to this car with two hispanic dudes, both pulling loaded 9mm's to the temples. It was crazy. I've never seen a gun to someone's head before, and I have to say, it's not that comfortable. And as the light turns green, the pickup truck in front of us has the NERVE to STAY stopped to watch!! Meanwhile I'm trying to get the hell out of there before I have six bullet holes in my window and see a trail of blood spilling out on the street. WTF is this guy in front of me thinking?!? I guess people really do think that things can't happen to them, but all I know is that if I see guns drawn and grown-ass men screaming and it's not directed at somebody I'm associated with, I'm gettin' the hell outta dodge. I read too many of these reports about stray bullets in NYC...
So that of course has me shook up a little bit, doing some thinking about what's important in life, which perfectly coincides with the question I've been struggling with for a few days...how harmonious should/can the relationship between CAREER interests and PERSONAL interests be?
I was "advised" a long time ago to choose a job over a location. I can see that argument, but now that I'm a little more able to think for myself based on my experience, I'd have to disagree. I do believe there are opportunities that may come along that we just shouldn't pass up, but even so I think that's a decision that only the person involved can make. I'm starting to think that being in a place you're happy, around people you care about and who care about you, is far more important than having an interesting job. I guess everyone views this differently, but I don't think a career is going to make you happy at the end of the day. You can't laugh and watch the game with a career. Nor can you cuddle up with a career and kiss it goodnight. I already know the answer to that question for me, and I'm pretty comfortable with saying that I'd rather have a mundane 9-to-5 and a great personal life than the greatest job in the world and a destroyed personal life. Of course ideally you wouldn't have to choose, and the lucky ones can have both.
This debate has been making my thought process churn lately, as I feel that my job is competing with my life. It's not the work environment or hours or anything like that, or even the travel, which has been strenuous. It's more about just being in NYC, which despite being a GREAT city to visit with unlimited things to do, can be a shitty place to live when you don't have excess cash or at least a few close peeps to share the struggle with, preferably whom you knew before NY. It's like quality of life just doesn't register there. But my job is tight. So....
(current background noise: air conditioner)
Okay, so that last question from the last post. Not like this is rocket science, but I like the happy resolution: You give the car to your best friend, he drives the old woman to the hospital, and you walk off in the rain with your girl. Since she's your girl, it doesn't matter the setting, weather, whatever as long as you have each other. Is that REALLY true?
I have to admit, I've been somewhat sheltered growing up in VA. Not like I haven't seen this or that, but for'real hardened violence/suffering/death...I've been fortunate enough to avoid that. Maybe that's why it caught me off guard the other day when my boy and I pulled up to a stoplight in Fairfax County, and a high speed chase damn near hit us! We had driven right by this cop about 1 minute prior, and the next thing I know as I'm pulling up to the light, I see a cop car swerve up on the grass and come back on the road cutting this guy off in the lane next to us. Then two cops rush out of the car and storm up to this car with two hispanic dudes, both pulling loaded 9mm's to the temples. It was crazy. I've never seen a gun to someone's head before, and I have to say, it's not that comfortable. And as the light turns green, the pickup truck in front of us has the NERVE to STAY stopped to watch!! Meanwhile I'm trying to get the hell out of there before I have six bullet holes in my window and see a trail of blood spilling out on the street. WTF is this guy in front of me thinking?!? I guess people really do think that things can't happen to them, but all I know is that if I see guns drawn and grown-ass men screaming and it's not directed at somebody I'm associated with, I'm gettin' the hell outta dodge. I read too many of these reports about stray bullets in NYC...
So that of course has me shook up a little bit, doing some thinking about what's important in life, which perfectly coincides with the question I've been struggling with for a few days...how harmonious should/can the relationship between CAREER interests and PERSONAL interests be?
I was "advised" a long time ago to choose a job over a location. I can see that argument, but now that I'm a little more able to think for myself based on my experience, I'd have to disagree. I do believe there are opportunities that may come along that we just shouldn't pass up, but even so I think that's a decision that only the person involved can make. I'm starting to think that being in a place you're happy, around people you care about and who care about you, is far more important than having an interesting job. I guess everyone views this differently, but I don't think a career is going to make you happy at the end of the day. You can't laugh and watch the game with a career. Nor can you cuddle up with a career and kiss it goodnight. I already know the answer to that question for me, and I'm pretty comfortable with saying that I'd rather have a mundane 9-to-5 and a great personal life than the greatest job in the world and a destroyed personal life. Of course ideally you wouldn't have to choose, and the lucky ones can have both.
This debate has been making my thought process churn lately, as I feel that my job is competing with my life. It's not the work environment or hours or anything like that, or even the travel, which has been strenuous. It's more about just being in NYC, which despite being a GREAT city to visit with unlimited things to do, can be a shitty place to live when you don't have excess cash or at least a few close peeps to share the struggle with, preferably whom you knew before NY. It's like quality of life just doesn't register there. But my job is tight. So....
Sunday, September 10, 2006
(current location: kitchen of Mom & Pops' house in the big VA)
(current background noise: "The Diary of Alicia Keys")
I want to write, so I'm writing. I've tried to start this blogging thing before, but it hasn't caught on. But how many times do I have to tell myself that I need to just write, and I never do? write. Write!!! WRITE!! It's really not pulling teeth.
Today's battle: Feelings vs. Logic
I don't know all that much about women or about psychology for that matter, but I find this field of gender psychology effin' fascinating. I'm not sure that it's technically a field, but it should be. I'm curious to find out what people think about this, but from my experiences I've seen a heavy inclination of women towards feeling-based decisionmaking, with guys leaning towards logic.
But I just don't understand how life can function making our every decision based on what we feel right NOW. At this particular moment. I mean, it's just reality that shit happens and life isn't peaches every day, right? I feel like sometimes we need to accept the routineness of life and of relationships. Isn't that what stability is? Hmmm...I'm not really sure where I'm going with this, but I'm tired so I want to sleep now. Try to pick up again later.
Before I go, I watched a movie recently, which I'll leave unnamed because it wasn't very good. But, there was one interesting hypothetical question posed, which for some reason I feel like sharing.
Alright, so you're at a bus stop in the pouring rain, and you have a car that will fit just two people. There's you, your best friend, who once saved your life, an old lady who needs to be rushed to a hospital, and your soul mate, who you're seeing for the first time. Who do you take in the car?
Chew on that for a minute.
(current background noise: "The Diary of Alicia Keys")
I want to write, so I'm writing. I've tried to start this blogging thing before, but it hasn't caught on. But how many times do I have to tell myself that I need to just write, and I never do? write. Write!!! WRITE!! It's really not pulling teeth.
Today's battle: Feelings vs. Logic
I don't know all that much about women or about psychology for that matter, but I find this field of gender psychology effin' fascinating. I'm not sure that it's technically a field, but it should be. I'm curious to find out what people think about this, but from my experiences I've seen a heavy inclination of women towards feeling-based decisionmaking, with guys leaning towards logic.
But I just don't understand how life can function making our every decision based on what we feel right NOW. At this particular moment. I mean, it's just reality that shit happens and life isn't peaches every day, right? I feel like sometimes we need to accept the routineness of life and of relationships. Isn't that what stability is? Hmmm...I'm not really sure where I'm going with this, but I'm tired so I want to sleep now. Try to pick up again later.
Before I go, I watched a movie recently, which I'll leave unnamed because it wasn't very good. But, there was one interesting hypothetical question posed, which for some reason I feel like sharing.
Alright, so you're at a bus stop in the pouring rain, and you have a car that will fit just two people. There's you, your best friend, who once saved your life, an old lady who needs to be rushed to a hospital, and your soul mate, who you're seeing for the first time. Who do you take in the car?
Chew on that for a minute.
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
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